


Legend of the Woodland Magus

by White_choco0



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Mythology, Angst and Feels, Apprenticeship, Celestial Bodies, Dark Magic, Different magical creature/species, England (Country), F/M, Fae & Fairies, Familiars, Friendship, Half-human/monster, Holy shit it's alot, Mages, Magic, Magic and Science, Magic-Users, Magical Accidents, Magical Artifacts, Magical Realism, Masters, Mystery, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Mythology - Freeform, Mythology References, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Ouch, Reader is magical girl, Romance, Sorcerers, Time to brush up on my mythology, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Why are kinky tags first to show up?, Worldbuilding, master/student
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-11
Updated: 2019-11-11
Packaged: 2021-01-06 08:09:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21223355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/White_choco0/pseuds/White_choco0
Summary: A young woman seeks adventure with a childish passion, her wish eventually granted. She is transported from her home to the England countryside where she becomes the apprentice of an ancient, socially confused mage and lives alongside him (and his cleaning fairy) in his picturesque house. However, trouble could only brew for such an unlikely pair.





	Legend of the Woodland Magus

**Author's Note:**

> Hi I'm back with another story, I'm using this mostly as a way to ease back into writing.  
If you're wondering whether this was inspired by The Ancient Magus Bride, you are 100% right. I love the manga and anime and am severely in love with bone daddy.

## Count Your Blessings

* * *

Chapter 1 ¤ My Only Wish is that My Wishes Be At Rest

○

_A wish's nature stems from selfishness._

_To desire what one will never grasp. Even the most trivial of wishes is plagued with man's indulgence._

A wistful exhale from your lips carried the silent wish into the embrace of the cool night air. Hands clasped together across the expanse of your bosom, your sleepless eyes were trained to the narrow cusp of your rich green tent. The wind howled as your soul did too, desperate for the arrival of an answer to your longings. The steady beat of your heart synced alongside the mantra of pleas you whispered, fruitless efforts exercised. 

Years. Extensive, excruciating years of this- 

This same process. You stubbornly and persistently pined for  _ it, _ for  _ that, _ for what would do it! For the element that would breathe a fiery passion into your soul- that which would evoke searing flames of desire to live to see another marrow and walk through it.

And what may have first elicited this rather unconventional cycle of heart-wrenching longing?

...Well,  _ what was it? _

You scowled at the persistent question, yourself quite accustomed to its naggy natured schedule: the inquiry did always show up when you were in a  _ moment. _ A moment described by you as a session of tenacious, petulant wishing. So then, when did this first start?

_ Ah! _ Sophomore year was it? Two rounds of 365 days ago, yes.

When life lost its luster and the dull remnants of everyday life became the lenses by which you saw the world through. 15 years old then and still seizing any opportunity to make a wish be it upon a star, 11:11, even an eyelash. It began there, you just cannot recall why _ .  _ All you knew was that come Sophomore year and you were already wishing for a spontaneous event to whisk you away anywhere that wasn't  _ here _ .

The winded years did no feat at chipping away your yearning, the desire never did die out and the almost painful longing had become an everyday burden to live with. Why couldn't exhilarating thrills be constant? Why did you have to be born into such a bland reality?

Restless now, you sat up with a frustrated start, groaning at the demanding ache in your muscles from having to be put through the torture of laying on the ground despite the barrier of a sleeping bag. Arms stretching, your fingers wandered to the zipper holding the flaps of your tent together.

You, with the utmost care, slowly and steadily, pried the zipper apart, mindful of the very minimal noise that threatened to wake your parents. As the opening became large enough for you to slip out, you slipped into a pair of boots and an overly burly jacket.

In all your slothful glory, you closed up your tent once more with the same precision and care and stepped away into the forest that surrounded the clearing. 

The night air was cool, quickly being the culprit behind the reddening of your cheeks and nose. You thanked your luck that you'd stored a pair of gloves in the pocket of your coat earlier, your hands were desperate for heat after all.

The wondering wasn't far. After trekking down a path of dry leaves and brittle branches, you had ceased your little adventure perhaps a quarter of a mile away from the camp. There was a small open space and you stepped into it, sinking into the lush green grass, your ass be damned whether it be dirt or insects crawling up there.

You pulled out your phone and frowned as it magically did not have service for the ninth time you checked that day. Two days in the wilderness and two to go with no reception, connection to society, or a convenience shop down the street.

The first day had been fun, but you had quickly realized after today that hiking was suicide for your weak legs. Being a modern teen and all, how could you anticipate to enjoy experiences that were only supposed to be rare events meant to be looked forward to. 

You spoke aloud, "Why doesn't anything exciting ever happen to me? Like a dragon showing up?" That would certainly spice things up even if it brought about death, but the reality made you frown. You dumped your head in your palms, fingers pressing deeply into your scalp.

After high school, you would attend college, after college, you'd get a job, and after that? Work, work, work, and maybe die. All those things people do for fun such as traveling, starting a family and kayaking seemed mediocre compared to what a fantasy land held in store.

But you would never know because  _ that  _ was just a  _ fantasy _ and  _ this  _ was  _ reality. _ Holy hell were you utterly bored with your life, it was such a weight you ungraciously slumped forward.

Despite understanding that the real world did not spontaneously grant you wishes, you still foolishly went to exclaim for the millionth time, "Please, please, please, for the love of all that you hold dear! Let me leave this place! I just want to live in a magical land where I can do something extraordinary!" 

It was immediately apparent that when said aloud, your desires that is, it made you sound like a complete bafoon. Still, you clung to hope.

You glanced above to the white speckled night, helplessly hopeful, dumbly hopeful... A few seconds went by, breath retained from the anticipation that perhaps this time, things would be different.

You glumly released a disappointed sigh as alas nothing did happen, much like the other two-hundred, thirty-seven times you'd asked, you weren't expecting much anyway. With your lips pursed together, you stood on two legs and kicked the ground in low spirits. You badly wanted something you'd never get despite already having everything you needed.

A crunch beneath your foot startled you, but when you investigated the cause of the sound, it was but a measly branch, nothing being out of the ordinary. Typical.

Bitter, you sought the nearest victim to unleash your upsetness towards; the split branch. The tip of your boot, with ill intentions, dug under the dry bark, and you would've kicked it too...

...if your shoe had not sunk into what was solid ground seconds ago-

You immediately backed away in alarm at the anomaly, brows furrowed in perplexion. But as you took a step back, it seemed the rest of the ground had mutated to an odd mush. You swore the ground had been rock solid when you first arrived:

"What

the 

hell-" 

As the substance swallowed your ankle whole, you let out a panicked gasp and leaped into action; It was quite literally that you did so, drawing your legs out of the baffling concoction as you viciously fought to escape it. The clearing had all together begun sinking into itself, mush becoming more liquid the further you managed to get. You could see the edge from which you would be able to latch onto if only you managed to reach it. 

Heavy panting had set in along with tears of fear, the substance now submerging your form beyond the waist seemed surreal. You screamed and wailed, desperately shrieking for help. Last you checked, you had been awake, and even if this were a dream, the suffocating terror felt too real just like this liquid. Having grown up largely a couch potato, you had no chance against your runny foe that rocked against you. The force of the swishing was powerful, drawing you back in like ocean currents. 

In spite of being entirely aware that the odds were against you in every shape and form, you stupidly kept pushing forth, sinking further and further as the edge of this growing ditch moved considerably from reach. The liquid beat ruthlessly against your tear-streaked face, however as unnaturally as this ordeal had been, it failed to drown you. You didn't feel your lungs painfully filling up...

Even as your last heaved wail for help was interrupted by the water overcoming your head, and even as the very tip of your middle finger was swallowed under the tumultuous liquid, no signs indicated drowning. 

All fell silent as you sunk lower and lower, the navy blue sky and the silver moon's veil moving steadily away from you. The hole of escape diminished, dilating to a spec that eventually became too microscopic to even hope to see. And when you realized that fighting, struggling and kicking, and flailing did you no favor, you stopped. 

For a moment, there was no more sound, no more struggle, no _ anything. _

The world was finally still again and you were simply existing within it. Behind your sealed lids your eyes detected the dance of light. It came and went as if indecisive to stay. Along with the fleeting flashes of light, you were enveloped in a warmness that could only be described as comforting, much like a mother's. This all resembled the whimsical constitution of a dream, the lights serving as the morning sun ready to greet you.

But you quickly discovered it was not the morning sun that greeted you as your eyelids fluttered open, nor were you in any kind of arms, the most befuddling thing of all was that you were  _ breathing _ within  _ a liquid _ . 

A less mortified gasp ripped from your throat this time, a wondrous sight to behold exhibited before you. Dancing wisps of light, strands of glowing radiance, and phosphorescent spheres that resembled dandelion seed balls floated mellowly about, each shining a uniquely beautiful hue. You glanced above your head, met with miles that extended into pitch black, the view below your feet not much different. 

It was determined you were falling given that your hair was floating above your head, the fabric of your clothes drawn upwards as well. You pushed at your button-down, keeping it from your face as you continued your descent. 

The scene reminded you of the young Alice falling through a rabbit hole. Maybe you were her and were headed to a place of madness, wouldn't be too off from the current situation, pleasant and peaceful as it strangely was. 

There was not much to do in a cylindrical vortex of pitch black with gentle lights fading by, you had only noticed you had been slowly spinning round seconds ago. The motion, after all, was hardly detectable. This being a slow, leisure fall eventually allowed for your fear to be replaced by anticipation. 

You pondered the hitch you were comprised in, of how if this were a dream (you were thoroughly convinced you'd wake up the moment you reached the end of this oversized ditch) that lucid dreaming was not as amazing as it had been made to seem. 

Whatever was the case, you still felt an underlying concern regarding how real this all was. Scientifically, it was impossible. But was there perhaps an iota of a chance that your prayers were answered at long last? 

You pursed your lips, wrapping your arms around your chest. Now that you were in this situation, you wished it not to be true. Only now was the gravity of your desires known, and it wasn't anything to laugh at. You could be stuck here with no one to come and save you. 

For another long period, you remained fixated in place, wondering how long until you would be able to leave and see the faces of your family. You already missed them and craved to see all their dumb expressions. Eventually, the wait had become so infuriatingly droll that you began messing around. Not very wise but certainly efficient in entertaining you. 

You did a few maneuvers, spinning your body horizontally and contorting your limbs in pitiful stretches. It was just like the movies where zero gravity was involved. 

You grunted as you, having tried a flip, comprised yourself in an upside-down position. Arms flapping to regain your initial form, another spontaneous event seized the wind from your lungs. 

The gentle fall had all together come to an abrupt end as you fell headfirst into a cold, hard and prickly surface. The entirety of the top of your head and a portion of your chest received the worst blows, lungs wheezing for air as it had been so suddenly ejected from the harsh impact. You rose to your forearms and knees, coughing and hacking as your back arched from the intensity of your convulsions. 

More confusion blossomed, it seemed to be highly prolific in your system as of late. The sudden change from a vortex to a tangible world had taxing effects on your body. Despite the liquid doing no harm earlier, now dumped out of it, it felt as if you had been holding your breath for centuries. You couldn't get enough of the compound, you greedily inhaling oxygen as a result. 

The events that had transpired seconds ago now rested temporarily in the back of your mind. What had purloined all your attention was not a dragon, nor the spectacle of the bland inside of your tent, not even the realization that you were alive. It was a most unlikely sight at this given moment.

And what could have been so unusual that it had the sheer capacity to leave you gawking like you'd made the discovery of the century worthy of the Noble Prize? 

Perhaps the singlehandedly most odd thing to encounter in this place. Or you could argue "things." 

Oxford shoes. 

A pair of shiny, polished, dark oxford shoes idly resting atop the grass. You took a minute to stare incredulously, your eyes tracing the squared tip, definitions, and the stiff laces holding the shoe together. Not so unusual was a pair of legs attached to the shoes, dressed in equally dark dress pants. Not too far from the ground, consisting of the same color pallet, was the hem of a parted robe. 

You made the choice to glance up, trailing the legs that went on for miles and miles it seemed. Your neck pleaded mercy, craned erratically until you could finally reach the face, or lack of, of this "person."

A shiver climbed your spine upon your eyes meeting hollow, pitch-black sockets engraved in an ivory-colored-

_ Skull! _

Not just any skull, an overwhelmingly large, predatory, nightmarish  _ wolf  _ skull! It donned frightening characteristics such that you felt your whole body tense, the sheer dread chained you in place and restricted any movement. 

Its maw could easily swallow the entirety of your arm, could crush it. To amplify your disquietude, this creature wore tall, twisted horns high above its skull. You could hear your trembling breaths, the cold sweat trickling down your back, and the pressure in your chest that made it difficult to inhale. 

In your hazy state of mind, you managed to notice the other strange aspects. More than anything was its human-like shape, of course not including the irregular head and purplish flesh peaking from its neck. Speaking of which, the humanoid even wore human garbs.

A three-piece suit to be more precise with a bolo tie neatly centered. Atop his suit was the long robe you noticed earlier, white gloves encasing the hands cresting from under the robe's billowy sleeves. 

The instant a staff pierced the air with a swing, you flinched, eyes trained on the long stick falling sharply centimeters from your face and sinking into the grass. 

You stared ahead for a prolonged moment until you glanced up again, brows wrung in worry. This could be the end if you so much as committed the wrong move. You knew not what to do, naturally wanting to flee however still rational enough to know to be anything but rash in your decisions. 

_ What to do, what to do?  _

You bit the inside of your cheek, choking back an onslaught of tears threatening to rush out the ducts any second now. It did not help that it was staring you down menacingly. If it was planning to eat you, could the creature just get on with it so you could wake up already? You didn't find the merit in prolonging this unless the humanoid was inherently in nature like a cat. Deriving sick pleasure from giving false hope to their prey. 

" _ Is 'this' what you present me with, Titania?  _ " A low and rich voice spoke, immediately after, the wind picked up with the intensity to blow your hair away. You swore you could hear whispers of multiple people as the forest rumbled and rustled, the prospect frightening as much as it elicited hope that maybe you could be saved if other persons were present. Currently, you were attempting to trace the source of the booming voice, but it proved for naught. That is until it sounded again after a long pause, "I see... I am thankful for your generosity." It didn't sound too thankful...

Finally, you deciphered the owner of the voice. As it turned out, said owner was none other than the humanoid. Shocking to you was the fact that its jaw did not unhinge when he (based on the voice it was male) spoke. 

You winced when he leaned down, gasped shortly after his incredibly large hand was presented before you. 

To you, he looked overwhelming large and dangerous, which would explain your heavy reluctance to even consider taking his hand. The fear urged you to speak, "W-what c-can I do fear-!! F-for you?" You shrunk at the stuttering mess you became, albeit maintaining a polite tongue in fear of upsetting the enigma before you.

When he leaned his skull down, two pairs of brilliant ruby beads shone back at you within the hollows, neither threatening nor friendly. The humanoid expelled a huff, puff of air emitting from the nostril sockets that dissipated into the night. "Are you afraid of me?" Steadily you nodded, careful to reside in as much of a calm and composed mindset. "Have I given you a reason to, or is it because of how I look?" 

You gasped softly, guilt striking you at your prejudice. Nevertheless, you defended, "I-it's in my nature!" You shouted, darting your head away. 

The humanoid hummed, edged with bitterness you easily picked up, "Yes, humans fear anything that doesn't look like them...right?" He was baiting you with his words and you fell right into his trap. 

Frowning, you never imagined that'd you'd ensue a debate with the very thing responsible for the chatter of your teeth, "It only makes sense," you argued, fixating your gaze to the glowing red, "The unknown can cause harm. Being afraid makes you careful, and careful survives"

You swore there was an element of amusement which temporarily glazed over the creature's beady eyes, he said, "For such a puny thing like you who is shaking like a leaf, you sure are talkative" 

With false confidence, you sat up, serious in saying, "Will you harm me?" 

He shook his head slowly as if being gentle, so as to not startle you away, "Not unless you harm me." 

At this, you had to heave a dry laugh in spite of the fear you were still drowning in, "What kind of harm could I do to you?" He was big and frightening with an aura that silently screamed underlying danger. Meanwhile, you had pliable flesh. 

"You'd be surprised at the reality..." He said sternly, disconcerting you severely with the finality he spoke with as if the vague entailment was something far beyond your understanding. And it was, you didn't know what he meant with such nebulous words. That was quickly left behind, however, as he, for the second time, offered his hand for you to take. 

You stared between the appendage and his sockets, unsettled frown on your lips, "I don't mean to offend, but I can't exactly trust you"

"You will if you want to live," he dauntingly said, adding, "there are far scarier things in this forest than me that have a craving for human flesh." You tried to display a defiant front and maintained your ground, unwilling to trust his words. At this, he sighed, the red in his sockets dimming. You thought he'd finally reached the end of his patience and was ready to devour you. Instead, he took his staff and with fluid grace, " _ tapped _ " _ _ your head. Your response was to yelp in pain, falling back and tending the sore spot with gentle pats. Suddenly your nostrils flared and you fiercely returned his steady gaze. As you were on the precipice of demanding an explanation, the humanoid huffed, albeit he sounded offended, "You don't speak to your master that way, I've been patient but we really must get going." 

_ Master!?  _

That sounded awfully kinky! You were befuddlement embodied as you questioningly glared at the preposterous creature. Indignation every which way present, you crossed your arms with furrowed eyebrows, "Master? When was that decided!?"

He looked calm as could be, enlightening you, "You made a wish did you not?" You thought back to earlier, scowling as you recalled your pitiful, ludicrous wishing.

"That I did," you admitted. "But it's not like I actually wanted it to happen!" You went on to ramble about how bored you were and how amazing the prospect of living your fantasy adventure was. A voice chimed in when you explained yourself, but not from the outside, it came from in you.

_ You wanted this  _

The echoing words were shrugged off as it being your conscience, nothing but a figment of your imagination. With a figurative lightbulb going off, you exclaimed, "That's right! This is all a figment of my imagination, a dream!" There was absolutely no way anyone would know your most secret desire, the only way possible would be if they belonged to a collection of creations per curtesy of your imagination. 

The creature looked unfazed which only solidified your belief. He declared, "Whether this a dream or not, you are my apprentice and as such, we can't have you in laggard garbs. Now, come along," he finished more sternly as if it was the last time he was asking. You'd prefer to not be on the receiving end when he spoke with that kind of tone.

With teeth sunk in your lip but feeling  _ much _ more assured than earlier(definitely not threatened), you took the offered hand and with ease, were pulled to your feet. It was then that he placed a hand on your shoulder, beginning to guide you into the shrouding trees of the forest. You momentarily glanced down to acknowledge your appearance, finding mud caking every crease in the fabrics. As you lamented the misfortune that'd befallen one of your favorite jackets and boots, your attention was drawn away to your surroundings. 

There were odd sounds, smells, and disquieting sensations like being watched. But nothing could overpower the haze that was quickly clouding your mind. You could feel an enormous weight on you the longer you walked, your companion unfazed. You thought to ask him to stop for a second but the instant you reached to tug at his robe, you felt your legs crumble and consciousness succumb to darkness. 

The first thing you noticed when waking up, was the divine aroma teasing your nose. Eggs, specifically bacon, and a hint of pastries wafted their aromatic essence into your body. This you found odd since your mom never cooked breakfast... that and you were supposed to be in the middle of the forest on a camping trip with mostly a supply of canned food. The rest was berries you'd picked with your bare hands.

The next strange thing was the plush mattress you were laid atop, not a raggedy and overheated sleeping bag or any of the sorts. You quickly leaped to your feet, world disoriented as your head clouded over. Standing too quickly was a fatal mistake as you were always too quick to ignore and suffered the consequences as a result. 

Now that you'd regained a sense of direction, you glanced down, feet disturbed by the rustling of the hem of a nightgown draped on you. When had you changed? When had you come indoors? When had you gone back to bed? 

With questions running amok unhinged through your mind, you were left with little to no choice but explore and gain some kind of solace. Softly, you wadded to one of the doors within the quaint bedroom, pulling it from its hinges to reveal a polished restroom.

You closed the door, opting for the only other available one within the vicinity. There wasn't much when you opened it, merely a simple-looking hall. There was a carpet, red in color, that ran down both sides. You leaned your head out and looked to the right, a railing that was very obviously part of a staircase was at the very end of the corridor. 

To the other side was an array of doors, all shut and likely locked, you weren't intending to venture anywhere that wasn't easily accessible anyways. When your toes fell against the red comfort, you had to pause and gawk at the next strange thing. 

It was a tuft of green leaves crammed together, sitting atop a soft textured lump of cream. This was absurd as it had eyes, blinking, functioning eyes. And just as it had been sitting on the railing ledge did it spoof out of existence, or perhaps sight... 

For a moment you almost believed you'd seen some kind of ethereal creature, but then you realized it was just your iron deficiency provoking hallucinations. You patted your forehead forlornly, lip wrinkling as you felt the pressure of an oncoming headache. 

You went to the staircase, immediately picking up the clambering sounds of kitchen utensils in use. It sounded like the kitchen was busy, and if it was busy, that meant someone was home. 

Carefully yet with a speedy bounce, you made your way down, making a ninety-degree turn halfway down. You emerged into a foyer, decorated homely with a dark wood drawer as tall as your waist, mounted atop it a vase of beautiful, fresh lilies. Your own eyes met through the oval mirror hung over the piece of furniture, reflection displaying yourself that looked rather good for someone who had woken up seconds ago.

You followed the noise after deeming yourself as presentable as possible in night clothes, walking down another corridor until the smell of food became stronger. With a churning stomach, you could not deny the desire for food elicited with such a delicious aroma wafting so freely about. You were eager to reach the kitchen for the sole purpose to eat, it felt as if it'd been days since your last meal. 

Farther along when you reached the destination you'd been hastily walking towards, all sound faded abruptly. 

The immediate silence was sickening as you barrelled into the kitchen, hearing so much clamor moments ago and now finding an empty space with no pots or pans laid out as the sounds had alluded the usage of; just a table set with two plates of freshly made breakfast. What in the heavens was happening? 

You didn't touch either of the plates, feeling notably wary and skeptical under the circumstances. 

As the frustrations of an unfamiliar home and situation bubbled over the surface of your calm, you sharply turned on your bare heel, frown etched deeply into your features. Upon the premise of the exit from where you'd initially entered, you heard the opening and shutting of a door. This was a telltale sign of an individual or individuals' presence. Whoever had arrived would be able to answer your questions surely... or potentially hurt you. 

_ Nevermind that  _ you shook away as best you could the thoughts of all that could go wrong.

Nervous jitters were bouncing in your stomach as you detected the sound of heavy and low-sounding steps approaching your location, giving you nothing short of seconds to ponder a speech. You hadn't anytime to prepare for who you were to face, moments after becoming aware of an oncoming presence did he appear right before you. Tall and broad, perturbing and yet familiar, you knew not what to make of this.

You shook your head out of the trance you'd fallen into, gapping at the tall creature with the body of a man and head of an uncanny beast. 

A river of memories flowed through your mind. The wish you'd made rung like a grim reminder of your descent into a vortex of darkness and wisps, followed by the curt fall into the mercy of the beast before you. 

_ Apprentice  _

The word echoed, never truly fading away. With the latest piece of the puzzle now at your disposition, it all mostly fell into place. You were dreaming. You couldn't believe you were still within the same dream. 

Eyes trained on glowing red beads and keeping the fear in your voice at a minimal level, you asked casually, "So... where are we?" 

He released a noise resembling a huff, looking down at you in all his bone head glory, you had to suppress your instincts to jolt, let alone run and hide. 

While you found his lack of reply rude, most of you was still unnerved by his appearance. After a prolonged moment of silence, he finally spoke, "Are you not going to take a seat? I would suspect that after three days of no food you'd be famished." 

With this newfound information, you had to halt an oncoming reply and deliberate.  _ Three days!  _

Utterly confused, you repeated, "Three days of no food? Shouldn't I be... dead?"

The humanoid shook his head, "You believe we're in one of your dreams, correct?" You nodded in confirmation, listening intently, "Then, it should be perfectly possible in the realm of dreams that you survive without the necessities of food or water." 

You clasped your chin in your index and thumb, eyebrows furrowed and head nodding once more. You hummed, "You're right. Anything  _ is  _ possible in dreamland."

"Indeed, now, kindly take a seat." It took a solid minute for you to understand that he was referring to a chair at the table, _ his  _ table. He stared at your form still stuck in the doorway, Detecting your uncertainty, he sighed wearily, "Would you prefer to eat without having to gaze upon my appearance?"

"What?" You sharply asked, immediately undulating your head. "No, that's not the problem." Except it kind of  _ was _ the problem... Being an efficient liar, you quickly concocted an excuse, "Parents teach their children never to take stuff from strangers. I'm being cautious is all," you calmly explained, watching as the dim red seemed to glow brighter as you spoke.

The creature appeared to be weighing his options of words, "You took my hand back there. Would you say that was against the teachings of your parents?"

"In a way yes," you admitted, "however, I only did that because it was most convenient to me." He appeared confused, which was strange since he had no facial muscles to indicate emotions and therefore you had no way of telling them. You crossed your arms and stepped up to the empty chair across from his. Leaning on the backrest, you further elaborated, "You said there were flesh-eating monsters, even alluding to the fact that they were more dangerous than you. Excuse me for thinking that me, myself, and I would not be able to survive on her own."

"Then are you saying that humans are so feeble and desperate to survive they are willing to take the hand of a monster so as to not encounter a bigger monster?" He set his fork down, which was held so elegantly as you earlier noticed. 

As he pried with his gaze alone, you shrugged, "Well, the first option usually would be to run. I saw no future in taking that option," you admitted with a nonchalant attitude. "In all honesty, I didn't find you all that threatening. Slacks and a fancy robe aren't big fear instigators now that I think about it..." you mumbled. "I digress, so far I think I made the right choice since I'm still alive."

He huffed, the red in his sockets dimming completely, "If you don't truly find me threatening, why is it then that you refuse to eat? You're all about surviving and don't you need food to survive?" He placed a stack of neatly sliced pancakes in his "mouth", a long tongue peaking briefly when he opened it. You shivered at the foreign creature despite your earlier words, he was an enigma after all. 

"Touché..." you muttered, a bit sheepish now that he'd rebuked quite intelligently. With a resigned sigh, you pulled back the chair you had been leaning on, wincing with a bashful exterior from the rather loud screech you'd elicited. "Alright," you declared, plummeting your rear into the seat, "I'll eat and hopefully not die."

"I guarantee you will not suffer even a minor scratch, although I highly recommend blowing on those pancakes to avoid any inconveniences." You smiled as his words elicited a chuckle from you but stopped once he stared back blankly. You shrugged, wondering if he had been jesting or if he was being serious. He didn't seem like the type to be too endowed with humor after all. 

Knife sinking into the thickness of the bread, you stabbed a fork into the sliced stack and brought it to your lips. You exhaled slowly, mouth parting hesitantly. He had altogether paused to observe your curious eating habits, his silverware abandoned on either side of his plate.

In a quick motion, you shoved the bite-sized slices into your mouth, chewing quickly and swallowing promptly afterward. When a few seconds passed and you didn't notice anything abnormal occurring in your body, you let out an appreciative hum. "Woah! This is so good! Did you make it?" 

He shook his head softly, reclaiming his fork and knife in his gloved hands. It was odd in your opinion that he ate with the accessories on, but it likely was a preference and who were you to judge? Clearly no one since you didn't even know the first rule of this universe. Your focus reverted to him when he said, "No, Luci did." 

You looked at him expectantly, "..." Wife? Sister? Friend? Roommate? You continued to shovel food in your mouth, you did not realize how overbearing your hunger had become until you nearly choked from badly chewed food. He didn't elaborate the second time you paused to star and you squinted your eyes in disbelief, speaking too late before you could think twice, "Am I just suppose to know who Luci is?" Hastily you slapped your palms over your mouth, muffedly uttering an apology after he merely gazed at you wordlessly.

He seemed unfazed by your snarky words and despite your shame for speaking so brashly, it brought your point across. He answered, "I had guessed you'd encounter her at some point. I had relied on the possibility that you'd wake up and come across her."

"Oh," you mumbled, reminded that according to him, you'd been asleep for three days. You recounted the events prior to re-encountering him, "I woke up a while ago, say half-an-hour, and heard noise from in here, when I came inside though, no one was here and there were plates laid out."

"She's a busy brownie, she's likely cleaning something" he explained, there was a very evident hint of appreciation when mentioning that she was cleaning. Perhaps he had a knack for cleanliness. Now that you thought about it, everything did look so incredibly tidy and impeccable. 

Still, you were hung up on something. After scarfing a slice of bacon down like a starved dog, you asked, "Brownie? What's that?" 

"Not 'that'" he chided, yourself uttering a small apology but unsure why. "A brownie is a spirit, they charge themselves with cleaning the house they occupy, therefore you must acknowledge them as a standing entity" 

After his very brief explanation, you could understand the chiding... Glancing up from your plate, you chirped, "Spirit? Neat!" First literal bone-headed beasts and now cleaning spirits? This dream was out to be a wild ride indeed. When you acknowledged the humanoid before you, he had changed composure.

He was leaning his skull head upon his fisted hand propped up by an elbow over the table, bright red gazing pointedly at you. You tilted your head, minding the hair strands that disturbed your face. He finally explained his shift in composure, "I expected some kind of outburst regarding the mention of spirits"

"Oh..." you hummed, swallowing thickly, "Well you see, you are an... abnormal... uh," you paused, smacking your lips together after a moment of contemplation, "I'm just gonna say it...you're an abnormal individual so, therefore, it's not too hard to believe a spirit that cleans is within the uh, realm of possibilities. Then again, I still think this is a dream." 

"Do you believe I am the greatest anomaly you'll encounter in this, 'dream' of yours?" He questioned, to which you shook your head 'no'.

"Nah, you did allude to weirder stuff after all. Plus, my imagination is a steaming cauldron of strange." You sighed, touching your temple, "You won't believe the kind of stuff I've dreamt up. So far you're the weirdest I've encountered though but it's also the first time I've lucidly dreamt"

"Is that so?" The inquiry felt rhetoric somehow, but you couldn't figure out why. 

Nevertheless, you nodded, "Yep, doesn't get stranger than a dapper sir with a 'fleshless'--is that a word-- head who has the manners of a prior-to-the-20th-century gentleman" 

"You'll be surprised to find out the reality then," he replied, his answer throwing you off. Laced with underlying sinistry, the mere sentence elicited an uneasy feeling in your gut. What a time to shift gears,  _ just _ when you were gaining some kind of conformity in this situation. You leaned in, curious.

Asking, "Find out what reality?" did nothing in your favor. The creature knew how his reply was twisting your insides and yet prolonged his explanation. The gleaming red orbs had now dilated and stretched into a thin line as if he was squinting. 

As mentioned, you weren't too well at interpreting his expressions. 

After sipping his tea, appearing unbothered by your very alarmed face, he only partially gave in to your silent pleas. With his jaw open, his deep voice rang out, "I really shouldn't say this with you still so weak." So it was one of  _ those _ scenarios. 

Well, you weren't having it.

You groaned, hands falling flat on the surface of the table, demanding, "Just say it." Your justification was, "I'll find out eventually, right? What's the point of keeping it from me then?" Besides, you didn't feel weak despite allegedly sleeping for three days. You felt more alive than ever before, it's as if the weight of all your responsibilities had been lifted and existing didn't feel like the bane of your life anymore.

You gazed pleadingly to the sockets returning the gesture, unyielding to the very unnerving sight of him. It felt like your efforts were for naught until he interlaced his fingers over the table, giving you a warning gaze, "It is without a doubt that the most befuddling creature you'll find here..." 

Disregarding the notice of potential damage he indicated with his gaze, you leaned in as if this was a conversation between close friends, content regarding the latest and juiciest gossip. You wondered what kind of creature would don the title of the strangest, it certainly had to be something if he thought the shock of revelation would be too much for you to handle. 

"Is yourself...

_ Sirius Pyrínas  _ " 

**Author's Note:**

> Ownership of Chapter 1 Title Quote Belongs to Ruckett. 
> 
> Tell me what you think.
> 
> Also, I suck at summaries lol but that's not the point. I've got Chapter One of Paradox ready, just need to do the whole shebang in ao3 with the tags and all. Thank you all for being so patient, I'll see you regularly now 💜💜


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